Friday Night Funnies: The Blonde Gets Even.

So, it's a long weekend and you are sitting back with a beer at the lake, time to enjoy the Friday night funnies!
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I was in the pub yesterday when I suddenly realized I desperately needed to fart. The music was really, really loud, so I timed my farts with the beat.

After a couple of songs, I started to feel better. I finished my pint and noticed that everybody was staring at me.

Then I suddenly remembered that I was listening to my iPod.
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A trucker came into a truck stop cafe and placed his order. He said, 'I want three flat tires, a pair of headlights and a pair of running boards.'

The brand new blonde waitress, not wanting to appear stupid, went to the kitchen and said to the cook, 'This guy out there just ordered three flat tires, a pair of headlights and a pair of running boards..... What does he think this place is, an auto parts store?'

'No,' the cook said. 'Three flat tires .... Means three pancakes; a pair of
headlights.. Is two eggs sunny side up; and a pair of running boards... Are 2 slices of crisp bacon'.

'Oh,... OK!' said the blonde.. She thought about it for a moment and then
spooned up a bowl of beans and gave it to the customer.

The trucker asked, 'What are the beans for Blondie?'

I LOVE THIS ONE......... .
'She replied, 'I thought while you were waiting for the flat tires,
headlights and running boards, you might as well gas up!'


FOR ONCE THE BLONDE GETS EVEN!!!!!
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I suspect this will be a very happy marriage!
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Brand new edition of...
"You know you're a redneck when......
1. You take your dog for a walk and you both use the same tree.
2. You can entertain yourself for more than 15 minutes with a fly swatter.
3. Your boat has not left the driveway in 15 years.
4. You burn your yard rather than mow it..
5. You think "The Nutcracker" is a vice on the work bench
6. The Salvation Army declines your furniture.
7. You offer to give someone the shirt off your back and they don't want it.
8. You have the local taxidermist on speed dial.
9. You come back from the dump with more than you took.
10. You keep a can of Raid on the kitchen table..
11. Your wife can climb a tree faster than your cat.
12. Your grandmother has "ammo" on her Christmas list.
13. You keep flea and tick soap in the shower.
14. You've been involved in a custody fight over a hunting dog.
15. You go to the stock car races and don't need a program.
16. You know how many bales of hay your car will hold..
17. You have a rag for a gas cap.
18. Your house doesn't have curtains, but your truck does.
19. You wonder how service stations keep their restrooms so clean ?
20. You can spit without opening your mouth.
21. You consider your license plate personalized because your father made it.
22. Your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand..
23. You have a complete set of salad bowls and they all say "Cool Whip" on the side.
24. The biggest city you've ever been to is Wal*Mart.
25. Your working TV sits on top of your non-working TV
26. You've used your ironing board as a buffet table.
27. A tornado hits your neighborhood and does $100,000 worth of improvements.
28. You've used a toilet brush to scratch your back.
29. You missed your 5th grade graduation because you were on jury duty.
30. You think fast food is hitting a deer at 65.
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Why dogs bite people....




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I know I have posted this before, but I still can't figure it out, can you??

She gets me every time!

Have a great long weekend!

CTV Bad Boy Fife!

Fife says Conservatives don't want an election, then goes on to tell us why they want an election. I think the hair dye has affected his brain.

Fife japs about Chrétien, saying broadband was his idea....what a Liberal suckup. Fife is losing it, seriously he's jumped the shark and ended up in the whales belly. Hello Fife, Chretien is a has been, he is out of power, you are worshiping a dinosaur. Fife is totally clueless, he pretends to be impartial yet slams Conservatives at every chance he gets. Here is another example of Fife being a Liberal

Pay attention to how snarky Fife is towards Jason Kenney.

Prime Minister Stephen Harper says a recession is no time to trigger an election, as political instability could undermine any potential economic recovery.

Harper added that the government's number one priority is to take care of the economy, which he said is still fragile after months of job losses.

CTV is going all out to make Canadians think that the economy is not recovering. I guess that's because they are worried about their jobs. If the Liberals don't get back into power soon, they will not get their senator appointments for life. Their papers will be left to declare bankruptcy. Sweet, that's a good reason to keep voting Conservative.

P.S. I am tired of trolls. From now on I will have comment moderation on. Goodbye SQ, LS, Gayle, and Mysty, you have outlived your welcome here because you have abused my generosity. You persist in taking over my blog with stupid (hey Obama called cops stupid so you should be down with that!) comments. Go back to rabble and CC's blog where you belong.

Humans Are Supposedly Superior To Animals?

Here are few recent articles that show how inhuman some people can be.

Baby Cut From Murdered Mother's Womb Found

Darlene Haynes, 23, was eight months pregnant when she was found Monday mutilated in a closet in her Massachusetts apartment. She had been wrapped in a comforter, and her unborn daughter, whom family said she planned to name Sheila Marie, had been cut out and taken.

Haynes had been dead for several days when her decomposing body was found by her landlord, William Thompson, who was responding to a report of a bad odor coming from inside. The body was so mutilated that police said they couldn't immediately determine her gender.

What the heck is wrong with people? This is not the first case of a pregnant woman being killed for the baby, and I am sure it will not be the last. Would you sit back and think about this for a moment. Think of this woman, 8 months pregnant confronted with two people who wanted her baby. Slash goes the knife cutting into her. The pain would be unbelievable. My baby....I must protect my baby! Or maybe they bludgeoned her to death, then cut out the baby. Smack goes the hammer to her head, but don't kill her until the baby is out or it may die. Don't shut off the images, it's the cowards way out. Imagine how Darlene Haynes died. No matter how you picture her death, it is violent.

See that person sitting next to you, so full of life? Imagine a blunt object hitting them on the head, or a knife slashing into their stomach. This was a human being who was brutally killed, all her hopes for the future died with her. We cry about the seals being killed, but are silent about the human beings, who had lives and futures, who are now lost to us.

If that doesn't sicken you enough, how about this one:

Court Records: Starved Texas Children Were in `Living Nightmare'

Inside the bathroom, the children said, they would go days without eating. Their mother said she gave them breakfast and dinner, though she was aware her boyfriend would not feed them while she was at work. She sneaked them food when she could, Abneris Santiago said, but "risked a beating" every time.

The children hid scraps of food in shampoo bottles, their pockets and "anywhere else they could hide it, not knowing when they might get to eat again," a CPS report said. Such behavior continued even after their rescue. The children were hospitalized for 10 days, "requiring constant supervision due to food hoarding," the report said.

The examining doctor said the children were of average height but in the bottom fifth percentile for weight. Their cheeks and eyes were hollow and sunken, their skin was flaky and they emitted a repugnant odor.

The report described Abneris Santiago as medically obese. During an interview with CPS officials, she repeatedly said she was hungry but that she was so upset she had been unable to eat for two days.

The kids are starving but the Mom is obese? The Mom didn't know that her daughter was being sexually abused? I suspect that the Mom was just happy to have a "man" who was interested in her, and pretended not to see what was happening to her own children. She certainly knew that the 3 of them were being kept in the bathroom. Sick and sad.

And humans are supposedly superior to animals? HA!

Wafergate, I Missed All The Fun!

Dang, I was on holidays when this all happened and so I missed all the fun! I wonder how many other people paid absolutely no attention to this dust up? Seeing as I know next to nothing about the issue, except as a Catholic, I really don't think it was such a big deal, I will link to some of my fellow bloggers who are way more knowledgeable than I am.

Always right on the mark, Blue Like You.

Our founder, Stephen Taylor.

One of my favorite blogs, Angry in the Great White North.

Start there, if you need more, many Blogging Tories covered the apology. Too bad the media is in cover up mode, it only hurts them more than if they were honest and apologized.

This type of media dishonesty makes me mad. I hope it wakes up voting Canadians to the fact that the media has an anti-conservative bias. That is the story, not the apology, although that was a great move, too bad it took 20 days.

No-one is going to remember this apology, the media has barely covered it. What has happened is that people are starting to clue in to the media bias, and the media is going to take a hit. So are the Liberals. PM Harper apologized very quickly to misinformation about Iggy, will Iggy be man enough to do the same? Are the Liberals going to endlessly look for that next Conservative "scandal"? Can a tiger change from stripes to spots? Don't think so, neither can the media.

Does anyone now wonder why the Prime Minister of our country has to go to the US to get a fair shake from the media? Can some journalists smell their own stink and actually start reporting the news? Stop making up scandals, start digging for the truth on this one. I suspect, it's not over. The Liberals have strong ties to many companies, too bad those companies can't contribute to them in real dollars anymore. Seems like the Liberals are using the media as a form of free advertising, and this one blew up in their faces.

Shame on the media. Even my kids know better than to lie.

Those Poor Seals? What About Baby Carrots?

While we were in BC we went salmon fishing, and caught two salmon and one shark.
The shark got thrown back into the ocean, the two salmon got clubbed over the head until dead. The crab we caught got it's shell ripped off and innards scrapped out (I think it was dead by then, but I'm not sure, I couldn't look).

Could I have done the clubbing and ripping off of the shell? Nope. Did I enjoy the salmon and crab, you bet! The crab was so sweet, dipped in lemon/garlic butter....YUMMM. Could you eat beef if you had to kill it? Very few of us could actually do the killing, but at least 90% of us will still eat meat. Today I killed a romaine lettuce for caesar salad, and pulled some carrots out of the ground, and yes, they were BABY carrots. My family enjoyed them.

Years ago, I went to my Aunt's farm to help with the cleaning of chickens, it was a stinky, dirty job, but I did it, and took home some fresh, free range chicken for my troubles. Did I like seeing the chickens killed, not in the least. That's what the animal rights groups count on, and that's why they still use 25 year old pictures of cute, white baby seals being clubbed, they know it will disgust us. We saw some seals, in the harbour, just waiting of all the fishermen to come back with their catches, so they could eat the scraps thrown to them. They are pests, but cute, like gophers on the prairies are cute, but pests.


I have never eaten seal, but I also refuse to eat lamb and veal, that's my choice, but I do not impose it on others. I hate kiwi, so I don't eat it. Should it be banned? How about horse? Not going to happen, but where are all the protests against those who eat dogs or cats? Cats...humm...something rings a bell about Liberals and cats. HA!

One of my neighbours gives me moose jerky, I love it, but I'm not about to go out and kill the moose, but once dead, I have no problem cooking and eating it. Think the seal hunt is inhuman? Go to your nearest slaughter house and see what goes on there.

As far as the seal hunt goes, I see it as no worse than the way we kill our domestic animals for food. Read the comments on this article, it seems the majority also supports the seal hunt. The Humane rep. better be careful, because she just called the government reports lies. Maybe these organizations and their representatives should be sued for slander. They had their way too long with the Liberal spineless government, now is the time for their free ride to end. Same with environmentalists saying the polar bears are endangered. They are the ones who are lying.

What happens when the seals start starving because of a population explosion, is a cull okay?

New Poster Welcome!

I have noticed a bunch of new posters to my site. WELCOME!

I was never politically active until I heard about the Liberals stealing millions of taxpayers money, and I thought, hey, I'm a taxpayer and that's my hard earned money.

It made my sick.

So I volunteered and worked for my MP in the 2006 election. It made me feel better. It was exciting that my MP would finally be "in government", and as Chairman of the Finance committee, he is doing a great job.

The Liberals can't accept the fact that Canadians don't like them very much anymore. They think picking a leader is okay, and that we should love him because they tell us to. The Liberals are elitists, they have no understanding of the "average" Canadian. They think a world wise, politically inept leader that lost to Dion is their best bet. Good luck with that thinking.

I post once a day, and usually I can not respond until later at night, after work. So I depend on my posters to defend the Conservative point of view.

I want to applaud all my regular posters for doing a great job of upholding Conservative values and battling the lefties. We need more of you!

So, to the new people posting here, welcome, the more the merrier!

No Honour In Killing!

As we are all aware, honour killings are happening here in Canada, and around the world. Islam is a sick religion that allows males to feel superior. So, where are the feminists? Why are they so silent? Typical lefties, advance your agenda no matter what the cost.

Atlas Shrugs gives a perfect picture of why we need to rise up.

This is the third honor killing post I have reported in the past 12 hours. And no one in the dinosaur media talks about it. All those loud mouthed full of shitniks talk big when excoriating and trashing those who fight for these women and recognize their plight, but they cower and wet their pants when forced to report on Islam. Instead they search for benign euphemisms for this most brutal and ugly ideology. The world in the West is changing for women. This war being waged in our society by Islam is about women, it's about power, it's about control.

I strongly suggest you go to the site, many examples of women who have been killed are listed. It's disgusting that we sit back as a nation and do nothing to protect those women because of political correctness.

The justifications for this crime, passed by word of mouth, apparently encourage young men and boys to consider it appropriate punishment for even trivial offences of females. Onal quotes a 14-year-old boy who slit his 16-year-old sister’s throat in the public market of the town of Urfa. Asked if he was remorseful, he explained that she had been “going about in cafés” and he had cleansed his dignity by killing her. Sentenced to 10 years, he served 34 months. (The use of brothers to commit the vile deed is a particularly horrible aspect of honour killings. In the Kingston murders, it is worth noting, one of those arrested was the alleged killers’ 18-year-old son.)

How can a brother kill a sister? My brother was always protective of me, as was my Dad. Can you imagine being scared of your own Dad? What a fearful life.

I am not a feminist. I never had the need to join a group for mutual support. I have never been a victim, thank goodness. I have never been raped, or attacked in anyway. I think feminists have had their time, but are now lost. If any organization should be yelling from the roof tops about honour killings, it's the feminists. But, they are silent. Too bad.

Feminists are too busy yapping about daycare and equal pay to be bothered with such things as honour killings, female gentile mutilation and burkas. Such a shame my "sisters" are just politically correct little Stepford wife's. Robots with no real compassion for the people who truly need their help.

Friday Night Funnies: 10 Inch Bic!

After a beautiful hot day, it's time to get out of the heat, sit back with a cold drink and laugh.


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Ole and Sven were fishing on the Michigan opener when Sven
pulled out a cigar. Finding he had no matches, he asked Ole
for a light.

'Ya, shure, I tink I haff a lighter,' he replied,
and then reaching into his tackle box, he pulled out a Bic
lighter 10 inches long.

'Yiminy Cricket!' exclaimed Sven, taking the huge
Bic Lighter in his hands. 'Vere dit yew git dat
monster??'

'Vell,' replied Ole, 'I got it from my
Genie.'

'You haff a Genie?' Sven asked.

'Ya, shure. It's right here in my tackle box,'
says Ole.

'Could I see him?'

Ole opens his tackle box & sure enough, out pops the
Genie.

Addressing the genie, Sven says, 'Hey dere! I'm a
good friend of your master. Vill you grant me vun vish?'

'Yes, I will,' says the Genie.

So Sven asks the Genie for a million bucks.

The Genie disappears back into the tackle box leaving Sven
sitting there waiting for his million bucks.

Shortly, the sky darkens and is filled with the sound of a
million ducks....flying directly overhead.

Over the roar of the million ducks Sven yells at Ole,
'Yumpin' Yimminy, I asked for a million bucks, not a
million ducks!'

Ole answers, 'Ya, I forgot to tell yew dat da Genie is
hart of hearing. Do yew really tink I asked for a 10-inch
Bic?"
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What Gets Longer When Pulled,
Fits Between your Boobs,
Inserts Neatly in a Hole
AND Works Best When Jerked?


A Seat belt you pervert! Buckle up!
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Lovemaking tips for Seniors

1. Wear your glasses. Make sure your partner is actually in the bed.

2. Set timer for 3 minutes, in case you doze off in the middle.

3. Set the mood with lighting. (Turn them ALL OFF!)

4. Make sure you put 911 on your speed dial before you begin.

5. Write partner's name on your hand in case you can't remember.

6. Keep the polygrip close by so your teeth don't end up under the bed.

7. Have Tylenol ready in case you actually complete the act.

8. Make all the noise you want... the neighbors are deaf too.

9. If it works, call everyone you know with the good news.

10. Don't even think about trying it twice.
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Why men don't write advice columns:

Dear Walter:

I hope you can help me here. The other day, I set off for work leaving my husband in the house watching the TV as usual. I hadn't driven more than a mile down the road when the engine conked out and the car shuddered to a halt. I walked back home to get my husband's help.



When I got home I couldn't believe my eyes. He was in our bedroom with the neighbors' daughter. I'm 32, my husband is 34, and the neighbors' daughter is 22. We have been married for ten years.

When I confronted him, he broke down and admitted that they had been having an affair for the past six months. I told him to stop or I'd leave him. He was let go from his job six months ago and he says he has been feeling increasingly depressed and worthless. I love him very much, but ever since I gave him the ultimatum he has become increasingly distant. He won't go to counseling and I'm afraid I can't get through to him anymore.

Can you please help?
Sincerely, Sheila

Dear Sheila:
A car stalling after being driven a short distance can be caused by a variety of faults with the engine... Start by checking that there is no debris in the fuel line. If it's clear, check the vacuum pipes and hoses on the intake manifold and also check all grounding wires. If none of these approaches solves the problem, it could be that the fuel pump itself is faulty, causing low delivery pressure to the injectors.

I hope this helps,
WALTER
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Two Nuns are riding their bicycles down the back streets of Rome .

One leans over to the other and says, "I've never come this way before."

The other Nun whispers, "It's the cobblestones."
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Have a great weekend. Get out and enjoy the summer weather.

Okay, This Is Going TOO Far!

I sort of understood when they stopped selling peanuts at ball games, because peanut allergies can be deadly. Still I thought that people with those allergies should know better than to buy those peanuts, but what do I know, I'm allergy free.

Traveling around BC, I saw signs about reporting "poachers and polluters" through something called RAPP. YIKES!! Polluters are now as bad as poachers. Does that mean if I throw a banana skin out of the window as I travel down the Trans Canada, I'm a polluter, and therefore a criminal? If I idle my car too long, will I now be thrown in jail? Ridiculous! BC thinks those growing BC bud are GREEN, it is biodegradable and organic. The smog you see around Vancouver is not CO2, it's the smoke from BC bud! Well that doesn't bother me, I don't do drugs, but if Vancouver wants to live in a drug haze, so be it. Remember they dump their raw sewage into the ocean, but Suzuki says nothing about that.

Where I absolutely draw the line, where I make my stand, is on hot dogs.

Group wants food-makers to put warnings on hot dogs

NEWARK, N.J. -- Hot dogs may be as American as baseball and apple pie, but a national cancer-awareness group says they're hazardous to your health and should carry warning labels.

The Washington, D.C.-based Cancer Project, a vegan advocacy group, wants to force hot dog makers to use warning labels. The group filed a lawsuit Wednesday in Superior Court in Newark on behalf of three New Jersey residents. The defendants are Kraft Foods Inc., manufacturer of the Oscar Mayer brand; Sara Lee Corp.; Nathan's Famous; and the makers of the Hebrew National and Sabrett brands.

The lawsuit cites a report by the American Institute for Cancer Research that concluded regular consumption of processed meat can increase the risk of colorectal and other forms of cancer.

Consumption of processed meat.... and only hot dogs are targeted? I dare all of you reading this to tell me how many processed foods you have in your fridge, pantry and especially in your freezer, right now. Cheese? Luncheon meats? Bread? Pizza Pops? Frozen Waffles? Sara Lee anything? Canned soup? Canned veggies? The list is endless. Next time you are in the grocery store pay attention to all the people going for the frozen food products. They have no fresh veggies in their carts.

Vegans can eat all the veggies they want, I don't care, but when they attack my favorite food, the hot dog, they have gone way too far!

I bet they sit and stuff their faces with ice cream and chocolate in the summer, but hot dogs, the king of processed foods are now bad? I suggest the vegans go up to the Arctic, find some poor old polar bears and let one group feed them lettuce and the other feed them hot dogs, let's see which group wins.

Hot dogs are the ultimate comfort food....you will have to pry it out of my cold dead hands with my beer and chips.

While Obama Is Redesigning America.......

The lefties still can't leave Palin alone. What are they scared of? That Obama is a failure?

All the complaints have been brought by Alaskans, except for one filed by Washington-based Citizens for Responsibility and Ethics alleging the $150,000-plus designer wardrobe the Republican Party bought to outfit Palin in her national quest violated the Federal Election Campaign Act. That complaint was dismissed.

One complaint, in which the Alaska Personnel Board found no wrongdoing, concluded with the governor agreeing to pay the state $10,000 for trips taken by her children — money that is due Tuesday.

Another complaint, filed by Democratic blogger Linda Kellen Biegel, said Palin wore a jacket that promoted the sponsor of her husband's snowmobile racing team. That complaint, dismissed June 2, prompted Palin's statement about "frivolous" ethics charges.

At least 19 ethics complaints have been filed against Palin, most of them after she was named the running mate for Republican presidential candidate John McCain. Most of those have been dismissed, and Palin's office usually sends a news release with the announcement.

The multiple ethics complaints include an investigation by state lawmakers over Palin's firing of her public safety commissioner.

John Coale, a Washington lawyer who helped set up the fund, called the probable cause finding "crazy," adding that if upheld, it would mean that no governor could ever defend themselves against frivolous ethics complaints.

"If this complaint is true, there's no way to defend yourself" as governor, Coale said. "Anybody can keep filing ethics complaints and drive someone out of office even if you're a nut."

Coale said that unlike other states, Alaska's governor has no legal counsel's office to defend the governor from allegations brought against the governor in her official capacity.

Funny how all the good stuff is at the END of the articles. Meanwhile they totally ignore what Obama is doing to America. Thank goodness some cartoonists are right-headed!


Meanwhile Obama is pushing through his health care changes.





How are those apologies to every enemy America has working out Obama?



But, let's attack Palin, she's obviously giving the lefties a wedgie. I think that the MSM is making a big mistake because by keeping Palin in the news, people are starting to pay attention to her. All those attacks are starting to tick the average American off.

"We Americans got so tired of being thought of as stupid by the rest of the world that we went to the polls last November and removed all doubt."

That last quote is a JOKE, for my lefty friends.

Hug Your Children Close!

As a parent, I can not imagine what Tori's parents are going through, it must be their worst nightmare. So hug your children close.

CTV has lots of video today.

What they do not have is the answer to one question. WHY?

Why would anyone do this to a baby? How sick must these people be to have killed a little 8 year old girl. It wasn't an accident, it was premeditated, cold blooded murder. Have you told you kids how much you love them today?

Dare you imagine what she went through? Can you let your mind even think about her panic and fear, or do you block the thoughts of what happened to her? What happened to her? Was she raped? Can you put yourself in her little shoes and feel her pain?

No parent should outlive their child, but to have your child taken from you by such sick people, such scum, is unimaginable.

Tori did nothing to deserve what happened to her. May she now rest in peace. May her parents and family gain some relief from her body being found.

May the scum who killed her never rest in peace, may their eternal souls burn in hell for what they did. Look how they hide their faces. Now, after they have murdered a little 8 year old girl and have been caught, now, they feel shame? May the jury sentence them to life, for the life that they took.



Remember to hug your kids close and tell them how much you love them. Godspeed Tori.

Alberta Needs To Wake Up!

We are sleeping through a recession, and no one seems to care. My husband has taken a 5% decrease in wages and he now works only 4 days a week. Our provincial government is doing nothing to help Albertans. They are so out of touch with us they think they are Liberals, and can lie to get us to vote for them again.

Wake up Alberta, your government is out of control. BC and Saskatchewan are doing great, meanwhile Alberta is swamped by their own deficit. Where's Ralph? The stupid backstreet boys thought it was time for Ralph to go and look what we got....StewedMack. How is our province doing? Deficits you say?? How could that happen? Fine, oil prices were down for a bit, but they were up to $140 and yet we are in a deficit?? I am tired of these fake Conservatives running our province into debt because they think we are going to keep electing them.

If you dare stand up for your constituents, watch out, you might get booted.

An Alberta Tory MLA and former provincial cabinet minister has been kicked out of the government caucus after he criticized funding delays for a long-term care facility in his constituency.

Fort McMurray-Wood Buffalo member Guy Boutilier was asked to leave Friday evening after a meeting with Premier Ed Stelmach over his public complaints, said the premier's spokesman.

"It was clear to the premier that the MLA is not prepared to support government policy," Paul Stanway said yesterday.

"(Boutilier has) been removed from the Treasury Board and he's been told he's no longer welcome in the government caucus."

Last week, Boutilier spoke out against a government decision to delay building a long-term care facility in the oilsands boomtown of Fort McMurray that was approved 18 months ago. Health Minister Ron Liepert said the construction would be put off for four years.

These guys are idiots and they have gotten too sure of their reelection. It is time to move our votes towards another right wing party.

I will never vote Liberal, Green or NDP, that leaves Wildrose Alliance. So far I am not impressed with them either. Get a recognized leader, like Preston or Ezra, then you might have a chance. Persuade Boutilier to join Wildrose, that would be a huge boost to your cause. He might be a good leader. Get some ads going, get recognized, get some good people to run in the next election. I might support Wildrose, but not with the current leadership candidates.

Right now Alberta needs a strong leader, and no party has one.

What A Light Show We Had!

I didn't post last night because I was too busy watching the light show that was going on outside. I love summer storms, but I didn't want the hail. My youngest captured it on my camera.



Near the end you will see the hail. Luckily this morning, other than some bruised flowers, everything seems fine.

Friday Night Funnies: Elvis

I know all you Friday Night Funnies addicts have missed this, so without further ado, let's get started.....

If you hear a "loud rumble" tonite in the sky, don't worry. It's not thunder.

It's Elvis beatin' the shit out of Michael Jackson for marrying his daughter.
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Bracelet at Tiffany's

A lady walks into Tiffany's. She looks
around, spots a beautiful
diamond bracelet and walks over to inspect it.
As she bends over to look more closely, she unexpectedly has
to fart.

Very embarrassed, she looks around nervously to
see if anyone noticed her little woops and prays that a sales
person wasn't anywhere near.

As she turns around, her worst nightmare
materializes in the form
of a salesman standing right behind her. Good
looking as well.

Cool as a cucumber, he displays all of the
qualities one would
expect of a professional in a store like
Tiffany's, he politely
greets the lady with, 'Good day, Madam. How
may we help you today?'

Blushing & uncomfortable, but still hoping
that the salesman
somehow missed her little 'incident',
she asks, 'Sir, what is the
price of this lovely bracelet?'

He answers, "Madam.. if you farted just
looking at it -

you're going to shit when I tell you
the price."
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I was depressed last night so I called Lifeline...

Got a freaking' call centre in Pakistan .

I told them I was suicidal.

They got all excited and asked if I could drive a truck.
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Mexican words of the day

1. *Cheese*
The teacher told Pepito to use the word cheese in a sentence. Pepito
replies: Maria likes me, but cheese fat.

2. *Mushroom*
When all my family get in the car, there's not mushroom.

3. *Shoulder*
My fren wanted 2 become a citizen but she didn't know how to read so I shoulder.

4. * Texas *
My fren always Texas me when I'm not home wondering where I'm at!

5. *Herpes*
Me and my fren ordered pizza. I got mine piece and she got herpes.

6. *July*
Ju told me ju were going to tha store and July to me! Julyer!

7. *Rectum*
I had 2 cars but my wife rectum!

8. *Chicken*
I was going to go to the store with my wife but chicken go herself.

9. *Wheelchair*
We only have one enchilada left, but don't worry wheelchair

10. *Chicken* *wing*
My wife plays the lottery so chicken wing.

11. *Harassment*
My wife caught me in bed with another women and I told her honey
harassment nothing to me.

12. *Bishop*
My wife fell down the stair so I had to pick the bishop.

13. *Body wash*
I want to go to the club but no body wash my kids.

14. *Budweiser*
That women over there has a nice body, budweiser face so ugly?
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In a Seattle Washington college classroom, they were discussing the
qualifications to be President of the United States. It was pretty
simple - the candidate must be a natural born citizen of at least 35
years of age.

However, one girl in the class immediately started in on how unfair was
the requirement to be a natural born citizen. In short, her opinion was
that this requirement prevented many capable individuals from becoming

president. The class was taking it in and letting her rant, but
everyone's jaw hit the floor when she wrapped up her argument by
stating, 'What makes a natural born citizen any more qualified to lead
this country than one born by C-section?'


Yep, these are the 18 year olds that just voted for the President of the
United States.
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Thought for the Day

A husband is someone who, after he takes the trash out, gives the impression that he just cleaned the whole house.
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Have a great weekend, and don't forget random acts of kindness, like a smile, go a long way.

Sailing Into Edmonton

When we were on Vancouver Island we visited the Naval Museum. A young lady came up to us and asked if we wanted to take a taxpayer sponsored tour of the shipyard. We agreed, along with around 8 other people who all happened to be from Alberta....you loving our Alberta bucks yet BC? We got closer to the ships then we would have been able to by ourselves.



Guess the name of this ship! It is one of our supply ships, and is very impressive up close.

Remember the 2 submarines the Liberals bought from the British? Here is a picture of the stripped down sub. Look deep into the belly of the structure, it's in there. You've got to wonder who the Liberals were paying off, those subs will never sail again, ever.


Got home in time for Capital Ex...aka Klondike Days. What interests me most is that some of the crew from the HMCF Edmonton will be in town to try and convince some prairie boys and girls to sign up.

The commanding officer and 14 members of the ship's company arrived in Edmonton yesterday and will stay for a week to participate in the annual summer event and to run their information booth.

Commanding officer Lt.-Cmdr. Patrick Montgomery said the "incredible hospitality" they receive from the people of Edmonton is the reason Canadian sailors keep coming back to Capital EX every year.

.... The ship, commissioned in Esquimalt in 1997, serves as part of Canada's Pacific fleet and is one of 12 Maritime Coastal Defence vessels.

The ships are 55 metres long, 11 metres wide and are each equipped with two 50-calibre machine guns and a 40mm Bofors guns.

I think it's one of these:



But I could be wrong. If any navy people read my blog, please correct me if I am, and tell us landlocked Albertans why we should like so much water!

I want to welcome the crew from the HMCF Edmonton (I bought one of your hats) to our city and I hope you have a great time here, but if I can't even get my 16 year old to bring his swimsuit on holidays, I don't think you are going to have much success with recruitment.

Robin Hood Rides Again!

When I was little, I loved the idea of Robin Hood, stealing from the rich to give to the poor. Back in the day, he would have been a hero because the poor were truly oppressed and mistreated by the rich. It was a feel good fairy tale, it still is, but Obama seems to think it's a good idea for the US.

WASHINGTON -- House Democrats scrambling for ways to pay for overhauling health care would raise taxes on the wealthiest Americans to levels not seen since the 1980s, breaking one of President Barack Obama's campaign pledges.

....The plan would honor Obama's campaign promise not to raise taxes on families making less than $250,000. But it would break an Obama pledge that no one -- including the wealthy -- would pay higher taxes than they did in the 1990s. The pledge, as listed on Obama's campaign Web site, was: "No family will pay higher tax rates than they would have paid in the 1990s."

Democrats argue that high-income families fared well under President George W. Bush's two terms as their taxes dropped and their incomes soared, giving them the ability to absorb higher taxes. Republicans argue that the tax increases would hurt small business owners who typically pay their business taxes on their individual returns.

Rep. Charles Rangel, chairman of tax-writing House Ways and Means Committee, called the plan "the moral thing to do."

"This innovative bill provides a uniquely American solution to control costs and put patients first without burdening future generations with debt," the New York Democrat said.

Legally steal from the rich to give to the poor. Make the rich pay for the increased costs of the health system. This works because the poor are envious, and feel entitled to their entitlements. Can you say you have not felt envious when you see someone driving a Lexus? How about driving through an upper class neighbourhood and seeing those huge houses with pools and tennis courts? Don't you feel jealous? Don't you want to be those people, live in their houses and not have to worry about money anymore? Have you ever bought a lottery ticket hoping to win those millions? We have all done that at one time or other.

The problem is that you need to work for those "things". No-one has the "right" to a house, or a job. You want to earn $350,000 a year, get an education and work for it. You want "free" health care, be prepared to pay extra taxes. The problem is that taking from the rich is not "the moral thing to do". What is moral about taking from the people who are productive and giving it to the non-productive. We have heard about the brain drain, this is going to cause a tax drain. Those with money are going to hide it off shore, and/or move to greener pastures.

Currently, the top marginal income tax rate is 35 percent. Obama wants to let some tax cuts enacted under Bush expire, boosting the top rate to 39.6 percent in 2011. The new health care taxes would increase the top rate to 45 percent.

House Republican leader John Boehner, R-Ohio, called the bill a job killer that would result in rationed care, fewer choices for patients and diminished quality.

Think about paying 45% in marginal income tax, then add in all the other taxes like property taxes. The poor can not move, the rich can and they will. Socialism tries to make all people suffer equally. It is based on envy and greed. Socialism punishes achievers, and the independently minded people who have ideas and start companies. Unions are a prime example. They want to take from the rich corporations and give to themselves. Socialism kills societies.

Robin Hood, in this day and age, would not be a hero, he would be a manipulator who whats you to think that everyone has the right to take what was never yours.

Stimulus That Is Working!

After reading no newspapers, watching no TV, and reading no blogs for 2 weeks, I really didn't miss much! Seriously, even my Liberal Catholic Mom couldn't get upset about whether PM Harper ate the host or not. She blamed the Bishop, not the PM. Other than that we got a good laugh about "my" PM Harper being late for the photo op again.

What all of us did agree on, was the one stimulus measure that all Canadians seem to be taking advantage of, if they can... the home renovation credit. My parents painted their house, my brother added a deck, and my sister needs no help renovating at anytime. We all have something planned this year so that we can take advantage of that credit.

As we traveled from Alberta to BC, we ran into some road construction, but not anymore than usual for this time of year. What we did notice were the houses getting new shingles, decks and even landscaping. Why do people actually pay for rocks??

All the stimulus money that is flowing does not impact us in a visible form. Sure a needed bridge or road will get built, but even though it is taxpayers money, we don't associate it with actual money out of our pockets. It's just money that the government has already taken from us and there is nothing we can really do about how it is spent.

I keep hearing about how 90% of economists think the GST reduction was not the way to go. My pocketbook hears the extra money hitting it's bottom everyday. I especially noticed it in BC where they also have the PST. My son was going to buy a game until he realized he would have to pay the PST. BC gas prices were 103.6 yesterday, we paid 109.? in Blue River BC. Today I noticed our gas price was 86.?. Thank goodness we don't have BC's PST nor their carbon tax. My parents are already sleeping without the air conditioner on in 30 degree weather, as it costs too much. They are dreading the winter.

If an election is coming this fall, I have some advise for the Conservatives. Extend the home renovation credit. It's simple, home owners understand it, and it is generating revenue for all sorts of companies, from landscapers to heating/refrigeration companies. How many of you are renovating this year to take advantage of the credit? I know we are, and I could always do more next year.

If we must have stimulus spending, at least extend the home renovation credit, it is visible to everyone who looks at their new roof or bathroom.

The Fish Was THIS BIG!!!!

We had an excellent holiday. Thank goodness I took pictures, because the salmon my husband caught is growing by the story telling. It was just over 22 pounds and we managed to freeze half of it and get it home to Edmonton. The other half we kept fresh on ice and fed to family in Kelowna.



What really made my day was that initially we were going to go whale watching out of Victoria, but the price was actually cheaper to go salmon fishing, and we just hoped that we might see some whales. Did we get our money's worth that day. We had already caught the big fish, when the whale watching boats showed up, passed us then stopped. Our captain, Ron from 2 Reel out of Sooke BC, told us we probably wouldn't catch anymore salmon if whales were in the area, but we keep fishing and moving towards the whale watching boats. Then the whales appeared very close to shore. What a sight! Notice that the whales are between us and the shore. At around 44 seconds you can see the whale watching boats way far out. By law they can not get close to the whales, but because we were fishing the same rules did not apply. HA!!! Watch the video, taken by my youngest son to see how close we got to them!



Words can not describe the experience. My advice, go salmon fishing, and if you are lucky you will see some whales too!

More later, the 10 hour return trip home from Kelowna has me longing for sleep!