I know lefties don't dare say this money is better spent on poverty or low cost housing, but you have to know that is what they are thinking.
Ottawa pledges additional $2-billion for wounded soldiers
The Conservatives plan to pump $2-billion into helping the country’s most severely injured veterans, Veterans Affairs Minister Jean-Pierre Blackburn and Defence Minister Peter MacKay told reporters in Ottawa as they reiterated the government’s support for the Canadian Forces.
“Our support will not end when the soldier leaves the army,” Mr. MacKay said.
From the comments we find this:
willie719
11:28 PM on September 19, 2010
Now I urge you all to watch this clip from YouTube, which lays out what I just wrote above. It is part of a five hour documentary from the ichannel several years ago that the cbc or the history channel will never show, showing just how disgusting the liberal government was back in the 1990's and DND as well, keeping quiet the Medak Pocket battle, the war dead, the hundred or so injured, and the fact that soldiers who had been wounded in battle and could no longer function in their units were booted out of the army altogether, some with NO compensation at all. Maybe these military men in the story above don't know their history. I urge them especially to watch this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c3VfSU1rfSE&feature=related
The Liberals treated our troops like dirt. They sent them into impossible situations, than ignored their injuries and deaths. The liberal media helped them in covering up the deaths and injuries these troops, NOT peacekeepers, suffered. Yet, a maybe, possible knowledge of torture by Afghans to Afghans has the Liberals and other socialists in a tizzy.
Let the opposition not forget, that the government of the day does not need their okay to send our troops anywhere deemed necessary by the government of Canada. It is only under PM Harper that they have been given any voice at all, and what do they do with their expanded powers? They slander our troops by accusing them of being complacent with torture. These petty little politicians should never be allowed near our troops, who have more honour in their pinkie finger than any of those Hezbollah/Taliban loving idiots!
I applaud our government for recognizing that our troops need our support not only in battle, but after they have returned home. I know more needs to be done, but this is a great first step.
I was thinking about why I'm not really that engaged with politics right now, and I came to the conclusion that I'm not hungry for a win anymore. Conservatives are in power now, not clawing their way out of opposition. The Liberals have been reduced to a rump party of Toronto/Montreal, and the NDP and Greens are irrelevant as usual.
Last election I just wasn't fired up because my MP wins by margins of 60% or more. We didn't have to fight the Liberals anymore, especially with Dion as their leader, Iggy is no better. I will volunteer in NDP MP Linda Duncan's riding next election because that is the only challenging seat left in Alberta.
If a lowly volunteer is unmotivated, how about our Conservative MP's? Have they lost the fire in their guts? Are they taking votes for granted? Are they just trying to hang on to power? Have they forgotten the voters who got them there in the first place? Here in Alberta, they know they will get reelected, not very motivating. If they aren't motivated, why should we be?
The long gun issue is one that might motivate Conservatives, but what else? What's on your wish list? The HRC's are at the top of mine.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- A teacher in a Detroit kindergarten class asked the kids what kind of sound a pig makes. Little Tyrone stood up and yelled:
"FREEZE, MUTHAFUCKA!! "
...I guess there aren't many farms in Detroit . ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I recently applied for a building permit for a new house.
It was going to be 40 ft tall and 400 ft wide with 9 gun turrets at various heights and windows all over the place and a loud outside entertainment sound system.
It would have parking for 200 cars and I was going to paint it snot green with pink trim.
The City Council told me to forget it,,,, AIN'T GONNA HAPPEN !!!!
So I sent in the application again, but this time I called it a Mosque.
.........Work starts on Monday... --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- THIS MAY COME AS A SURPRISE TO THOSE OF YOU NOT LIVING IN LAS VEGAS, BUT THERE ARE MORE CATHOLIC CHURCHES THAN CASINOS.
NOT SURPRISINGLY, SOME WORSHIPERS AT SUNDAY SERVICES WILL GIVE CASINO CHIPS RATHER THAN CASH WHEN THE BASKET IS PASSED.
SINCE THEY GET CHIPS FROM MANY DIFFERENT CASINOS, THE CHURCHES HAVE DEVISED A METHOD TO COLLECT THE OFFERINGS.
THE CHURCHES SEND ALL THEIR COLLECTED CHIPS TO A NEARBY FRANCISCAN MONASTERY FOR SORTING AND THEN THE CHIPS ARE TAKEN TO THE CASINOS OF ORIGIN AND CASHED IN.
THIS IS DONE BY THE CHIP MONKS. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I'M SO GLAD I FOUND OUT ABOUT THIS!
The correct way to weigh yourself: I can't believe I was doing it wrong all these years.
WE MUST SPREAD THE WORD.
Never take life seriously; nobody gets out alive anyway. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity 1.. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down. 2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice! 3..Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, ask If They Want Fries with that. 4. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks .. Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso. 5. In the Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write 'For Marijuana.' 6. Skip down the hall Rather Than Walk and see how many looks you get. 7. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face. 8. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is 'To Go'. 9. Sing Along At The Opera. 10. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You have a headache. 11.When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream 'I Won! I Won!' 12. When Leaving the Zoo, Start Running towards the Parking lot, Yelling 'Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!' 13. Tell Your Children Over Dinner, 'Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go.'
And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity 14. PICK UP A BOX OF CONDOMS AT THE PHARMACY, GO TO THE COUNTER AND ASK WHERE THE FITTING ROOM IS. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Bedtime, the kitchen needs work tomorrow. Have a great weekend. No frozen tomatoes I hope.
How ethical is this? What an eyesore! Deep gouges in the earth, no trees, tailing ponds, a blight on our earth. A non-renewable resource that is being dug up as fast as people are demanding it! The solution, environmentalists tell us is to stop production. I agree! If people would stop buying it, the companies would not be making obscene profits, and wildlife would not be threatened. A new book by Ezra Levant called "Ethical Oil" makes the case that Alberta oilsands are the most ethical in the world. Why do environmentalists and greenies pick on Canada? If it's not our seal hunt they are japping about, it's the oilsands. Why have they been quiet about the Gulf oil spill? Why aren't they over in China protesting their coal mines? Why are they quiet about this:
All those pictures are not the Alberta oilsands, it's pictures of mining operations for granite! That very popular, must have kitchen countertop! Granite! It is a non-renewable resource, that companies in the US, Italy, Brazil and India, to name a few, are digging up as fast as they can to meet the ever increasing demand from households and businesses.
That's not the worse of it. Granite is actually dangerous.
“It’s not that all granite is dangerous,” said Stanley Liebert, the quality assurance director at CMT Laboratories in Clifton Park, N.Y., who took radiation measurements at Dr. Sugarman’s house. “But I’ve seen a few that might heat up your Cheerios a little.”
Allegations that granite countertops may emit dangerous levels of radon and radiation have been raised periodically over the past decade, mostly by makers and distributors of competing countertop materials. The Marble Institute of America has said such claims are “ludicrous” because although granite is known to contain uranium and other radioactive materials like thorium and potassium, the amounts in countertops are not enough to pose a health threat.
.....
The E.P.A. recommends taking action if radon gas levels in the home exceeds 4 picocuries per liter of air (a measure of radioactive emission); about the same risk for cancer as smoking a half a pack of cigarettes per day. In Dr. Sugarman’s kitchen, the readings were 100 picocuries per liter. In her basement, where radon readings are expected to be higher because the gas usually seeps into homes from decaying uranium underground, the readings were 6 picocuries per liter.
So, forget granite countertops in my home. I wonder if Suzuki has granite in his homes? How about Green May?
I wonder when the environmentalists are going to start shouting about the radon in granite, it being a non-renewable resource, and how mining granite is killing the environment and destroying the natural habitat? Right..... I'm not holding my breath waiting, I prefer my cheerios cold and safe to eat.
Family members are essentially being misled into believing patients are dead when they may not be, and in some rare cases people’s hearts could actually start beating again after being silent for the required two to five minutes, the physicians say.
It's bad enough in Canada that you can't even find a family doctor, but to get your organs cut out when you might not be dead, is a little shocking!
Now, does this sound familiar?
Supporters of donation after cardiac death, however, say the issues have been discussed and settled, especially in Canada. A “consensus conference” of 120 medical, ethical and legal experts issued a report in 2006 that concluded the idea was appropriate and set out clear guidelines, noted Dr. Sam Shemie, a Montreal intensive-care physician.
We have heard this from lefties before, "the science is settled" sound familiar? Hint...Global warming, which has now been proven to be a huge money grabbing scheme! Science is about "consensus", even if it is your LIFE they are talking about. Scary? It should be. A "consensus " of a whole 120 experts, and some lawyers, have decided that you can be cut, sliced and diced, before you are really dead, for the greater good of humanity!
Most transplant organs are taken from patients declared brain dead. Those people account for only about 10% of hospital deaths, leaving a shortage of donors, and hundreds of gravely ill Canadians languishing and dying on transplant waiting lists.
In response, the medical community has recently embraced the new protocol — which was actually employed decades ago but abandoned in the 1960s — based on death occurring after the patient’s heart has stopped beating for a period of at least five minutes.
Funny didn't they sterilize mentally ill people in the 60's too? Is that coming back?
I guess we just aren't dying quickly enough for all those "in need". Medical ethics anyone? Not in the progressive playbook is seems. No heartbeat for two minutes, say goodbye to your organs! This seriously makes me rethink signing my donor card. Too bad, because if anyone can use any of my organs, they are welcome to them, but if I'm not really dead when they take them, I will come back to haunt the takers.
If you can, you are obviously a Globe and Mail reader, and not a Sun newspaper reader according to elitist Liberal supporters. So on top of that, SUN TV will be only further fodder for us illiterates, or so says Atwood.
Mr. Levant is less than truthful. Ms. Atwood's beef about the SUN Tv application was that THE PRIME MINISTER OF CANADA was attempting to influence and intimidate the body that governs broadcasting in Canada, CRTC.
Is this an indication of how truthful SUN TV will be? If so, then I agree with others who believe that SUN will strive to be anything but fair and balanced, much like its American cousin, FOX news!
Fairandbalanced is anything but fair and balanced. He/She/It has already decided that SUN TV will not be balanced. As we all know, CBC and CTV are fair and balanced, if you are a lefty that is, but a station that isn't even in existence will not be balanced, so say the lefties. The hysteria about a station that hasn't even aired is really funny, considering that a station funded by BLOOD OIL Saudis was accepted in Canada without so much as a whisper from our lefties.
For your typical lefty thinking we have:
What's the Story Korey
September 13th 2010, 7:45pm
That right wing little shit Korey better how his pal Fat Steve Harper holds on long enough to give the bottom feeding Sun TV a licence. Otherwise the Liberals will shred Korey's application and give inbred TV the pass.
NICE! What a profound statement! My 14 year old son is more mature than this guy/gal/it! I would bet money they are a university student.
The smell of desperation is sticking to the Liberals like glue to your kids latest art project. Telling SUN readers that they can't read is a winning strategy for Liberals. It will make the Liberal elites cream their drawers thinking they have really put those red neck Conservative voters in their proper place, at the bottom of the food chain, where all Liberals know they belong.
Unfortunately for those ohhh so progressive regressives, we are on to their silly games, and we will show them with our ability to read the ballot box.
I have had it with being called on to donate money to every charity, for every cause under the sun! Enough!
I had two canvassers come to my door to try to get me to adopt a child in Africa. They opened by showing a picture of a starving child and asking me if I cried when I saw their ads showing starving children. They just about fell off my steps when I told them, "No. Blatant emotional manipulation doesn't work for me". I asked them how much of the money donated actually got to those starving children, they didn't know. I asked them if they had ever been over to Africa to help those children, they said no. They were paid canvassers. That means money you give to those charities goes to hire them, not to help the starving children.
I find church groups do the best job in actually helping impoverished people. They send their own people, so the contact is direct, not hands length. They also don't make it their career to suck money from people to pay themselves. Too many charitable organizations, too few dollars.
The government has just extended the deadline for donations to Pakistan's flood victims, they will match our donations dollar for dollar. At the same time, we hear that Haiti has only cleared around 8% of the damage. Where have our dollars gone? Maybe Michelle Jean should look into that...but I doubt she will, it's all about optics. PETA says they are protecting animals, and then we find out they actually kill more cats and dogs than your local animal shelter.
Too many charities, who are way too pushy, too disconnected from the very people they are trying to help. I think a lot of people have just stopped giving money to any charity because they don't trust any of them anymore. It's sad to think that those kids starving in Africa are not getting any money, because the actual organizations who are supposed to help them are so top heavy with money grabbers, the money gets funneled to them not the kids.
I give money to charities, as I'm sure you all do, but, I make sure that the money goes directly to those who need it, and not the administrators. I hope you do the same.
Americans understand. 40,000 showed up today for a freedom rally. No media coverage so far, so we need to spread the word through our blogs and email.
The main organizer was Pam from Atlas Shrugs, go there and read some of the speeches, especially the one given by Geert Wilders.
America is awakening. With Tea Parties, and Freedom Rallies drawing huge numbers of supporters. November can't come fast enough. Good luck America, you hold your future in your hands.
Then look at what the Muslims were up to in London England:
"We just have to pass the Healthcare Bill to see what's in it." - Nancy Pelosi (Quoted March, 2010)
''Life's tough .. it's even tougher if you're stupid.'' - John Wayne --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- It appears that the Democrats already think they have invaded Canada! They do not think our oil is "foreign". Well I hate to disagree, but, Canada is a sovereign nation, and therefore our oil is "foreign" to the USA. We are happy to share it, for a price, but it is not yours. As a matter of fact, it's not even Canada's (remember the NEP?), it's Alberta's!
One of the most powerful politicians in the U.S. said that while Washington wants to wean itself off foreign oil, Canada is the exception because it isn't "foreign," according to Alberta Premier Ed Stelmach.
The comments came as U.S Speaker of the House of Representatives Nancy Pelosi met with politicians, environmentalists and First Nations leaders in Calgary.
"She didn't consider Canada to be foreign oil," Stelmach said Thursday, noting that the politicians also spoke about his province's efforts in renewable energy during their dinner meeting on Wednesday.
So US Democrats feel they can dictate to us how we sell our oil? Environmentalists think they can dictate how we sell our oil? Easterners (McGuinty and Charest) think they can dictate to us how we sell our oil, even though they don't buy it? How about Albertan's sell their own oil, to whomever they want to, like China and India, if the US is unhappy with our "dirty" oil? How would Pelosi like to explain to the American people that 20% of the oil they need has become unavailable because Alberta doesn't want to sell their "dirty" oil to the USA anymore? Can you say $8.00 a gallon gas Nancy?
You don't want our "dirty" oil? Go buy "blood" oil from the Middle East and continue to support terrorism. Oh, and did anyone ask you about the environmental disaster that is happening in the Gulf right now? Did the environmental groups ask you about that? Funny how quiet the greenies have been about that little spill. You would suspect that because far left Obama is in power that the econuts are happy and that's why they are so quiet. What has happened to protests against "dirty" coal? Hello greenies, your prejudices are showing!
Politicians are still talking "global warming", econuts are still talking "climate change", with straight faces. HA!
One of those groups is Environmental Defence, whose executive director Rick Smith took issue with Stelmach's characterization of the oilsands.
Smith said the U.S. has never threatened to cut off Canadian oil imports, and he said that Stelmach was creating a "straw man" to distract from the real issues of pollution and climate change.
Hey Smith you ever seen the oilsands? Mother Nature's biggest oil spill ever, and all we are doing is cleaning up the mess, why would environmentalists complain about that?
Pelosi is a typical Californian lefty, who will be retired in November, so Rae can get a boner about meeting the botox queen, but he might want to be careful about his stance on energy.
Where were our MP's this summer? I got a newsletter from mine, but heard nothing else about his activities. I am also wondering if our riding got any of that stimulus money. Supposedly most of the stimulus money went only to Conservative riding's, so I imagine mine got some, but I haven't seen any of those "Action Plan" signs anywhere in the riding.
I find the newsletters dry and too political. They give no sense of my MP's personality, or what he is doing in our community. The Conservatives are flat, faceless and invisible. I don't even know what they stand for anymore.
I want passion for Canada, and want them to stand up for Canada. I don't want negative ads, I want them shouting their pride for Canada and how well we handled the recession. I want to hear that they still support our troops.
I want them to stop being scared to say anything that the Liberal MSM might take wrong. The Liberal MSM is always going to find fault with anything any Conservative says, so forget about worrying about them. They will get you no matter how hard you try to please them.
As a matter of fact, I want to see Conservatives taking the media to task. I want them to show some balls! I want them on David Rutherford, helping him get the message out. I am sick and tired of the lefties making the rules in committee, and then the Conservatives getting blamed for doing nothing.
I want all Conservative MP's front and center and in the media's face, everyday. I want the undecided voters to know who Rona Ambrose, Mike Lake and all Conservative MP's are, and most importantly what they are doing for Canada.
Come out, come out wherever you are! Quit being afraid of your own pension shadows and work for Canadians. The undecided voters want something to vote for, not against!
How did Obama do in his first year? CBS wants you to rate various factors. Here is how he is doing so far:
Yikes, that has to sting! Even on a lefty site, Obama only scores an F by 64% of Americans...and a few Canadians. This is not a good sign for the Democrat's in the upcoming November elections.
Americans are giving him a huge thumbs down on health care, smart people that they are, they understand socialist programs are bad for everyone.
A clear 79% of Americans do not like the health care bill. That is huge considering all the Obama supporters in the last election. Where has all the support for a hope and change president gone? Maybe it's evaporated because he has offered no hope and bad changes. Go vote if you want, even you Liberal trolls, maybe you can bump up his numbers, but I wouldn't count on it. Too bad he has 4 years in power. This poll was opened in January and appears to still be open, are they hoping for the numbers to change for the better?
I suspect, by the numbers attracted to the Tea Party movement, that things are going to change come November, it appears that Americans are realizing what a huge mistake they made electing Obama. Sure makes me thankful that we have Prime Minister Stephen Harper to guide this wonderful country.
I found this comment at the site very interesting:
CBO: Eight Years of Iraq War Cost Less Than Obama's Two Year Stimulus Act
As President Obama prepares to tie a bow on U.S. combat operations in Iraq, Congressional Budget Office numbers show that the total cost of the eight-year war was less than the stimulus bill passed by the Democratic-led Congress in 2009.
According to CBO numbers in its Budget and Economic Outlook published this month, the cost of Operation Iraqi Freedom was $709 billion for military and related activities, including training of Iraqi forces and diplomatic operations.
The projected cost of the stimulus, which passed in February 2009, and is expected to have a shelf life of two years, was $862 billion.
The U.S. deficit for fiscal year 2010 is expected to be $1.3 trillion, according to CBO. That compares to a 2007 deficit of $160.7 billion and a 2008 deficit of $458.6 billion, according to data provided by the U.S. Office of Management and Budget.
In 2007 and 2008, the deficit as a percentage of gross domestic product was 1.2 percent and 3.2 percent, respectively.
"Relative to the size of the economy, this year's deficit is expected to be the second largest shortfall in the past 65 years; 9.1 percent of gross domestic product (GDP), exceeded only by last year's deficit of 9.9 percent of GDP," CBO wrote.
The CBO figures show that the most expensive year of the Iraq war was in 2008, the year when the surge proposed by Gen. David Petraeus and approved by President Bush was in full swing and the turning point in the war. The total cost of Iraq operations in 2008 was $140 billion. In 2007, the cost of Iraq operations was $124 billion.
According to an analysis by the American Thinker's Randall Hoven, the cost of the Iraq war from 2003-2008 -- when Bush was in office -- was $20 billion less than the cost of education spending and less than a quarter of the cost of Medicare spending during that same period.
Too bad the stimulus money did next to nothing for the American economy. It's Americans who are suffering for the bad fiscal policies of the Democrats...remember they have total control of both the Congress and the Senate, plus the White House with a Democratic President, so they have no excuse for their own failed policies.
I can't wait to see what happens in November, will America reawaken, or will they slumber on?
Like him, love him, or hate him, this one says a lot!! Only he could get away with this ....
Hello, dummies! Oh my God, look at you. Anyone else hurt in the accident?
Seriously, Senator Reid has a face of a Saint - A Saint Bernard. Now I know why they call you the arithmetic man. You add partisanship, subtract pleasure, divide attention, and multiply ignorance. Reid is so physically unimposing, he makes Pee Wee Herman look like Mr. T. And Reid's so dumb, he makes Speaker Pelosi look like an intellectual. Nevada is soooo screwed! If I were less polite, I'd say Reid makes Kevin Federline look successful.
Speaking of the Speaker ... Nancy Pelosi, hubba, hubba! Hey baby, you must've been something before electricity. Seriously, the Speaker may look like an idiot and talks like an idiot but don't let that fool you. She really is an idiot.
Charlie Rangel ... still alive and still robbing the taxpayers blind. What does that make, six decades of theft? Rangel's the only man with a rent-controlled mansion. He's the guy who writes our tax laws but forgot to pay taxes on $75 grand in rental income! So why isn't he the Treasury Secretary? Rangel runs more scams than a Nigerian Banker.
Barney Frank ... he's a better actor than Fred Flintstone. Consider that he and Dodd caused the whole financial meltdown, and they're not only not serving time with Bubba and Rodney, they're still heading up the financial system! Let's all admit it ... Barney Frank slobbers more than a sheepdog on Novocain.. How did this guy get elected? Oh, that's right ... he's from Massachusetts . That's the state that elects Mr. Charisma, John Kerry -- man of the people!
You know, if Senator Dodd were any more crooked, you could open wine bottles with him. Here's a news flash, Dodd: when your local newspaper calls you a "lying weasel," it may be time to retire. Dodd's involved in more shady deals than the Clintons . Even Rangel looks up to him!
Press Secretary Robert Gibbs, I really respect you ... especially given your upbringing ~ All you've overcome. I heard your birth certificate is an apology from the condom factory. I don't know what makes you so dumb, but it really works for you. Personally, I don't think you're a fool, but what's my opinion compared to that of thousands of others?
As for President Obama, what can I say? They say President Obama's arrogant and aloof, but I don't agree. Now it's true when you enter the room, you have to kiss his ring. I don't mind, but he has it in his back pocket. His mind is open to new ideas -- so open that ideas simply pass through it. Obama lies so much, I was actually surprised to find out his first name really was Barack. Just don't ask about his middle name! But Obama was able to set a record ... he actually lied more in 60 days than Bill Clinton. FOR THOSE THAT VOTED FOR "HOPE AND CHANGE".....
BEND OVER AND PREPARE TO RECEIVE YOUR BOUNTY! President Obama just completed the UNHOLY and ANTI-AMERICAN TRIFECTA:
1st president in 110 years to miss the annual Army-Navy Football Game. 1st president to not attend any Christmas religious observance. 1st president to stay on vacation after a terrorist attack.
AND ALL IN THE SAME MONTH! WHAT A GREAT PRESIDENT -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Dr Visit for a colonoscopy? I went into my proctologist's office for my first rectal exam. His new nurse, Evelyn, took me to an examining room and told me to get undressed and have a seat until the doctor could see me. She said that he would only be a few minutes.
After putting on the gown that she gave me I sat down. While waiting I observed that there were three items on a stand next to the exam table:
A Tube of K-Y jelly,
A rubber glove
And a beer .
When the doctor finally came in I said, "Look Doc, I'm a little confused. This is my first exam..
I know what the K-Y is for
And I know what the glove is for,
But can you tell me what the BEER is for?
At that Doctor Paul became noticeably outraged and stormed over to the door. He flung the door open and yelled to his nurse .. . . . . .
Evelyn!!! Damnit, woman
I said a BUTT LIGHT " ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- To my friends who enjoy a glass of wine... And those who don't and are always Seen with a bottle of water in their hand. As Ben Franklin said: In wine there is wisdom, In beer there is freedom, In water there is bacteria. In a number of carefully controlled trials, Scientists have demonstrated that if we drink 1 litre of water each day, At the end of the year we would have absorbed More than 1 kilo of Escherichia coli, (E.. Coli) - bacteria found in feces. In other words, we are consuming 1 kilo of poop. However, We do NOT run that risk when drinking wine & beer (or tequila, rum, whiskey or other liquor) Because alcohol has to go through a purification process Of boiling, filtering and/or fermenting. Remember: Water = Poop, Wine = Health . Therefore, it's better to drink wine and talk stupid, Than to drink water and be full of poop. There is no need to thank me for this valuable information: I'm doing it as a public service! --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Top Ten Reasons Why Men Prefer Guns Over Women
#10 - You can trade an old 44 for a new 22.
#9 - You can keep one gun at home and have another for when you're on the road.
#8 - If you admire a friend's gun and tell him so, he will probably let you try it out a few times.
#7 - Your primary gun doesn't mind if you keep another gun for a backup.
#6 - Your gun will stay with you even if you run out of ammo.
#5 - A gun doesn't take up a lot of closet space.
#4 - Guns function normally every day of the month.
#3 - A gun doesn't ask , "Do these new grips make me look fat?"
#2 - A gun doesn't mind if you go to sleep after you use it.
And the Number One reason Why Men Prefer Guns over women.....
#1 - You can buy a silencer for a gun! ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Why do we love children?
NUDITY I was driving with my three young children one warm summer evening when a woman in the convertible ahead of us stood up and waved. She was stark naked! As I was reeling from the shock, I heard my 5-year-old shout from the back seat, 'Mom, that lady isn't wearing a seat belt!'
OPINIONS On the first day of school, a first-grader handed his teacher a note from his mother. The note read, 'The opinions expressed by this child are not necessarily those of his parents ..'
KETCHUP A woman was trying hard to get the ketchup out of the jar. During her struggle the phone rang so she asked her 4-year-old daughter to answer the phone.. 'Mommy can't come to the phone to talk to you right now She's hitting the bottle.
MORE NUDITY
A little boy got lost at the YMCA and found himself in the women's locker room. When he was spotted, the room burst into shrieks, with ladies grabbing towels and running for cover. The little boy watched in amazement and then asked, 'What's the matter, haven't you ever seen a little boy before?'
POLICE # 1 While taking a routine vandalism report at an elementary school, I was interrupted by a little girl about 6 years old. Looking up and down at my uniform, she asked, 'Are you a cop? Yes,' I answered and continued writing the report. My mother said if I ever needed help I should ask the police. Is that right?' 'Yes, that's right,' I told her. 'Well, then,' she said as she extended her foot toward me, 'would you please tie my shoe?'
POLICE #2 It was the end of the day when I parked my police van in front of the station. As I gathered my equipment, my K-9 partner, Jake, was barking, and I saw a little boy staring in at me. 'Is that a dog you got back there?' he asked. 'It sure is,' I replied. Puzzled, the boy looked at me and then towards the back of the van. Finally he said, 'What'd he do?
ELDERLY While working for an organization that delivers lunches to elderly shut-ins, I used to take my 4-year-old daughter on my afternoon rounds. She was unfailingly intrigued by the various appliances of old age, particularly the canes, walkers and wheelchairs. One day I found her staring at a pair of false teeth soaking in a glass. As I braced myself for the inevitable barrage of questions, she merely turned and whispered, 'The tooth fairy will never believe this!'
DRESS-UP A little girl was watching her parents dress for a party. When she saw her dad donning his tuxedo, she warned, 'Daddy, you shouldn't wear that suit.' 'And why not, darling?' 'You know that it always gives you a headache the next morning.'
DEATH While walking along the sidewalk in front of his church, our minister heard the intoning of a prayer that nearly made his collar wilt. Apparently, his 5-year-old son and his playmates had found a dead robin. Feeling that proper burial should be performed, they had secured a small box and cotton batting, then dug a hole and made ready for the disposal of the deceased. The minister's son was chosen to say the appropriate prayers and with sonorous dignity intoned his version of what he thought his father always said: 'Glory be unto the Faaather, and unto the Sonnn, and into the hole he goooes.' (I want this line used at my funeral!)
SCHOOL A little girl had just finished her first week of school. 'I'm just wasting my time,' she said to her mother. 'I can't read, I can't write, and they won't let me talk!'
BIBLE A little boy opened the big family Bible. He was fascinated as he fingered through the old pages. Suddenly, something fell out of the Bible. He picked up the object and looked at it. What he saw was an old leaf that had been pressed in between the pages. 'Mama, look what I found,' the boy called out. 'What have you got there, dear?' With astonishment in the young boy's voice, he answered, 'I think it's Adam's underwear!' ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- People who can't drown:
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- And finally for your stupid game of the week: Simpsons skate naked! Reading the instructions helps.
No posts this long weekend, busy painting ceilings, walls, cabinets, and getting new back splash and installing new lights. A simple job has become a monster!!!!
I've been thinking about who my favorite MP is and I have a few favorites, Laurie Hawn, and Rona Ambrose come to mind, but if I had to pick only one, it would be Mike Lake, Edmonton-Millwoods-Beaumont. Why?
Superficially, he is young, great looking, has a wife who is beautiful, and a young family. More importantly, with a young family it must be hard to leave to do his job in Ottawa. His son is autistic, making it even harder for him to leave every week. That shows me that he has a high level of commitment to his job and constituents. He makes tired old Iggy look, well, tired and old! Compare him to Hedy Fried, and he comes out aces in the sane department. He is a solid Conservative MP, with enough personality to make him very appealing to voters.
A lot of Reform MP's got elected in Alberta no matter what their qualifications, and are still around. Most are doing good jobs but will never be Ministerial material. Mike Lake came after the reform movement, and has huge potential. I would rate him my favorite up and coming MP.
Now I want you to tell me..."Who do you love" as your favorite MP, of any party, and why. For now I will open up my comment section, so you can champion your favorites. Please remember to keep it "family friendly". Have fun.
The Tory Boy has struck again, this time it's the long gun registry he's highlighted. Good one Tory Boy!
It's up to you, if you are represented by a Liberal or NDP MP, call them and let them know that you want more police and less gun registry. Let them know your vote will go to the Conservatives if they don't vote for scrapping the crap. I wonder what Goodale is going to do. He has to know the long gun registry is wildly unpopular with us prairie people.
What really ticks me off about this whole issue is the police organizations who want to keep it. They have become very political, and that should not be allowed. Don't the unions realize that they could get more police if the registry was scrapped? Are they so stupid that they think the registry will protect or help their front line officers? Shouldn't the police be neutral like our army, navy and air force? What can the union members do about disagreeing with the union position? Are the police chief's union members, if not, why haven't the police unions spoken out against the registry? Lefties constantly attack our troops and the police, isn't it about time that real cops speak out? We need some truth, not just the one side that the media feeds us.
Let the opposition play games, it only makes them look like fools. Scrap the crap. h/t SassyLassie
I really feel that the mosque in New York at ground zero is a slap in the face to all westerners. It is a sad statement about terrorism. The victims are forgotten in the politically correct atmosphere that doesn't allow anyone to criticize Islam without being called a bigot.
I remember the morning of September 11, I hope we all do. Unfortunately, many people seem to prefer to forget that over 3000 totally innocent people lost their lives that day, including many firefighters who were trying to save all those people. I remember the story of the blind person with his seeing eye dog who guided him out to the building. Good puppy!! There were many stories of hero's that day. Without terrorism, we wouldn't need so many heroes!
With the arrests in Canada of terror suspects, it makes me think back to that horrible day, Sept 11. Does building a mosque fundamentally change a nation? Not usually, but it might this time, as it is a slap in the face to all westerners and especially the over 3000 innocents killed on 9/11.
A guy walked into the local welfare office to pick up his check.
He marched straight up to the counter and said, "Hi.. You know...., I just HATE drawing welfare. I'd really rather have a job."
The social worker behind the counter said, "Your timing is excellent. We just got a job opening from a very wealthy old man who wants a Chauffeur and bodyguard for his beautiful daughter. You'll have to drive around in his 2011 Mercedes-Benz CL, and he will supply all of your clothes.
"Because of the long hours, meals will be provided. You'll also be expected to escort the daughter on her overseas holiday trips. This is rather awkward to say but you will also have as part of your job assignment to satisfy her sexual urges as the daughter is in her mid-20's and has a rather strong sex drive."
The guy, just plain wide-eyed, said, "You're bullshittin' me!"
The social worker said, "Yeah, well ... You started it." ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Stanley died in a fire and his body was burned pretty badly. The morgue needed someone to identify the body, so they sent for his two best friends, Cooter and Gomer. The three men had always done everything together. Cooter arrived first, and when the mortician pulled back the sheet, Cooter said, 'Yup, his face is burned up pretty bad. You better roll him over.' The mortician rolled him over and Cooter said, 'Nope, ain't Stanley ' The mortician thought this was rather strange. So he brought Gomer in to confirm the identity of the body. Gomer looked at the body and said, 'Yup, he's pretty well burnt up.
Roll him over..' The mortician rolled him over and Gomer said, 'No, it ain't Stanley 'The mortician asked, 'How can you tell?' Gomer said, 'Well, Stanley had two assholes.' 'What? He had two assholes?' asked the mortician. 'Yup, we never seen 'em, but everybody used to say:
'There's Stanley with them two assholes.' -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- You might be a redneck if: It never occurred to you to be offended by the phrase, 'One nation, under God..'
You might be a redneck if: You've never protested about seeing the 10 Commandments posted in public places.
You might be a redneck if: You still say ' Christmas' instead of 'Winter Festival.'
You might be a redneck if: You bow your head when someone prays.
You might be a redneck if: You stand and place your hand over your heart when they play the National Anthem
You might be a redneck if: You treat our armed forces veterans with great respect, and always have.
You might be a redneck if: You've never burned an American flag, nor intend to.
You might be a redneck if: You know what you believe and you aren't afraid to say so, no matter who is listening.
You might be a redneck if: You respect your elders and raised your kids to do the same.
You might be a redneck if: You'd give your last dollar to a friend.
( just want everyone to know that a "redneck" is a farmer, providing all of us with food on our table, without them, we are eating dirt pies. So slam "redneck's" all you want but remember who feeds you!) ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Last Tuesday President Obama got off the helicopter in front of The White House - carrying a baby piglet under each arm. The squared-away Marine guard snapped to attention, saluted and said:
"Nice pigs, sir."
The President replied: "These are not pigs. These are authentic Arkansas Razorback Hogs. I got one for Secretary of State Hillary Clinton, and I got one for Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi."
The squared-away Marine again snapped to attention, salutes and said,
"Excellent trade, sir." ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Three strangers strike up a conversation in the passenger lounge in the Bozeman, Montana airport, while waiting for their respective flights..
One is an American Indian passing through from Lame Deer, another is a Cowboy on his way to Billings for a livestock show and the third passenger is a fundamentalist Arab student, newly arrived at Montana StateUniversity from the Middle East.. Their discussion drifts to their diverse cultures. Soon, the two Westerners learn that the Arab is a devout, radical Muslim and the conversation falls into an uneasy lull.
The cowboy leans back in his chair, crosses his boots on a magazine table, tips his big sweat-stained hat forward over his face, and lights a cigarette. The wind outside is blowing tumbleweeds around, and the old windsock is flapping; but still no plane comes.
Finally, the American Indian clears his throat and softly he speaks, 'At one time here... my people were many... but sadly, now we are few.'
The Muslim student raises an eyebrow and leans forward, 'Once my people were few,' he sneers, 'and now we are many. Why do you suppose that is?'
The cowboy removes his cigarette from his mouth and from the darkness beneath his Stetson says in a smooth drawl . . .
'I reckon that's 'cause we ain't played Cowboys and Muslims yet, but I do believe it's a-comin'.' ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Greyhounds might be the fastest dogs on the planet, but they are also the champion couch potatoes! --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- At the end of the tax year, the Tax Office sent an inspector to audit the books of a local hospital. While the Tax Office agent was checking the books he turned to the CEO of the hospital and said, "I notice you buy a lot of bandages. What do you do with the end of the roll when there's too little left to be of any use?"
"Good question," noted the CEO. "We save them up and send them back to the bandage company and every now and then they send us a free box of bandages."
"Oh," replied the auditor, somewhat disappointed that his unusual question had a practical answer. But on he went, in his obnoxious way
"What about all these plaster purchases? What do you do with what's left over after setting a cast on a patient?"
"Ah, yes," replied the CEO, realising that the inspector was trying to trap him with an unanswerable question . "We save it and send it back to the manufacturer, and every now and then they send us a free package of plaster."
"I see," replied the auditor, thinking hard about how he could fluster the know-it-all CEO. "Well," he went on, "What do you do with all the leftover foreskins from the circumcisions you perform?"
"Here, too, we do not waste," answered the CEO. "What we do is save all the little foreskins and send them to the Tax Office, and about once a year they send us a complete prick." ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Dentist with a good sense of humour..
The other day, a gentleman went to the Dentist's office to have a tooth pulled. The Dentist pulls out a freezing needle to give him a shot.
"No way"! No needles! "I hate needles", the man said.
The Dentist starts to hook up the laughing gas and the man immediately objected.
"I can't do the gas thing either; the thought of having the gas mask on is suffocating me"!
The Dentist then asks the gentleman if he has any objection to taking a pill.
"No objection", the man said. "I'm fine with pills".
The Dentist then returns and says, "Here's a Viagra tablet".
The gentleman, totally at a loss for words, said in amazement, "WOW"! "I didn't know Viagra worked as a pain killer"!
"It doesn't", said the Dentist, "but it will give you something to hold on to when I pull your tooth" -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Two Large Plastic Trash Bags
A little old lady was walking down the street dragging two large plastic trash bags behind her. One of the bags rips, and every once in a while a $20 bill falls out onto the sidewalk.
Noticing this, a policeman stops her, and says, "Ma'am, there are $20 bills falling out of your bag."
"Oh, really? Darn!" said the little old lady. "I'd better go back, and see if I can find them. Thanks for telling me."
"Well, now, not so fast," says the cop. "How did you get all that money? "You didn't steal it, did you?"
"Oh, no", said the little old lady. "You see, my back yard is right next to the football stadium parking lot. On game days, a lot of fans come and pee through the fence into my flower garden. So, I stand behind the fence with my hedge clippers. Each time some guy sticks his tallywacker through the fence, I say, '$20 or off it comes'.
"Well, that seems only fair" laughs the cop. "OK. Good luck! Oh, by the way, what's in the other bag?"
"Well, you know", "not everybody pays". -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- It was the end of the day when I parked my police van in front of the station. As I gathered my equipment, my K-9 partner, Jake, was barking, and I saw a little boy staring in at me. 'Is that a dog you got back there?' he asked. 'It sure is,' I replied. Puzzled, the boy looked at me and then towards the back of the van. Finally he said, 'What'd he do? ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Have great weekend!
Can you see the difference? CTV mocks the PM, the laughing and giggling is really juvenile. The video is stupid and defines how immature CTV really is, but I'm sure lefties loved it. The video supplied by David Akin shows the real truth. No editing, just the raw footage. Good for David, he is a real reporter, whether he supports the PM or not, he gave an unbiased report.
CTV showed their Liberal bias with their coverage of our PM. Yes, OUR PM!!!! That has not gotten through to the medias thick heads. PM Harper really is what people want. He really is the Prime Minister of Canada! That dance just won him the north!
Funny how Jean eating a raw seal heart was showing support for our northern people, but PM Harper dancing with them wasn't. Can you see the hypocrisy of the left? Can you smell their desperation? It is stinking up our country and I'm not sure that we have enough brooms to rid ourselves of the riffraff!
CTV can mock our PM as much as they want,..... for now, but SunTV will give us a different more honest prospective. I can't wait!!
Mockery is the lowest form of intellectual pursuit. I guess CTV caters to the lefty bottom feeders and Liberal elite....or are they the same?
PM Harper scored a huge hit with our northern people, and CTV didn't like it, not one little bit. So, they had to mock it. Such babies lacking in any intellectual skills. Good for PM Harper, it has the lefties in a tizzy!
I spent all day getting my boys registered for school. Most kids had their parents with them, even though they were in grade 12. My grade twelve kid liked having me with him, but my grade nine kid didn't want me to stand in line with him until it was time to pay his fees. The point is that I was with them whether they wanted me to be or not. They know I care. They know I am interested in what they are doing, and who they are doing it with.
The men are suspected of preparing a terrorist attack targeting Canada. The ringleader allegedly attended training camps in the Pakistan and Afghanistan region.
.....
In a speech in Toronto on Aug. 9, when he would have already been briefed on the suspected Ottawa group, Minister Toews said he was increasingly concerned about the radicalization taking place in Canada.
“There are homegrown Islamists and other extremists here in Canada,” he said. “In this country, it is the right of all Canadians to hold and discuss a wide range of beliefs.
“But what we are seeing here is not about disagreement and debate. Our concern is with extremist ideologies that lead individuals to espouse or engage in violence. These individuals reject the values on which our country is based, and they must be stopped.”
Do the parents take these kids to a mosque with a radical Imam? Do they encourage them towards radical ideologies? I don't know. I do know that parents need to monitor their children, Muslim or not.
KUDOS to our police, please continue to make sure Canada is safe. Stop those terrorists before they damage our soil. Terrorists need to understand that our military and police are the best in the world, and they have proved it by keeping Canadians safe.
Seeing as nothing much is happening on the political scene, except Wayne Easter from PEI making a fool of himself again, I thought you might be interested in my new hobby..... stripping! HA!
I started with one small project, and it has expanded from there.
I forgot to get a before picture of my first attempt (above), but I have some of my next attempt.
A $10 garage sale find, that got transformed into this:
I did take some time off of from stripping to take in the new Jurassic Forest, it's worth every penny they charge, ($13 for adults, and $10 for teens) all the dinosaurs are animated and life sized.
I can't strip tomorrow because it is school registration for my boys, that's $420.00 and doesn't even include supplies. Ouch. So much for "free" schooling.
My current stripping project is my kitchen cabinets, they are beautiful oak cabinets that needed refinishing, I am hoping to get it done by Christmas, as I don't want to be stripping when my parents come for the holidays.
I am keeping the oak doors natural, and I'm thinking of painting the the rest of the cabinets a green to match my plants (You can see the samples in the picture below). On top of new hinges and handles it appears we need new appliances and a new counter top, but I hate the new fad for everything stainless steel and granite, both are so cold, and won't go well with my old fashioned oak cabinets. Any ideas would be appreciated.
You can see by the finished doors (hours of sanding with my new orbital (birthday present) and mouse sanders) that I want to get rid of the old dark manufactured cabinet look and lighten up the kitchen. I also want a gas stove with 5 burners, but that will have to wait, probably for years. Sigh!
If you don't hear from me everyday, it's because I'm out in my garage..... stripping!
Politicians have a habit of getting into office and then forgetting that it is the voters who got them the job. A great example is going on right now in Edmonton. We have a wonderful city center airport about 5 minutes from downtown, and our mayor wants to close it and put up condos. Did I mention our mayor is a real estate developer? Our international airport is 45 minutes outside of the city, because another mayor's family owned the land.
We have already voted once to keep the airport open, and now the mayor is trying to get around that vote and just close it down without our having any say about it. One of the main things that concerns me is that our Stars Air Ambulance lands there, and they would not be able to anymore. That would mean 45 minute ambulance rides from the international airport, leaving only 15 minutes of the golden hour to save someone. The people in the University area already shutdown Stars from landing anywhere near the hospital, bunch of NIMBY's!
It also shows the lack of thinking about the future that seems to impact local politicians. Edmonton is going to keep growing, and as the north develops, we will need more flights into the city. No vision, "I know best" politicians cost us taxpayers more in the long run. We needed an overpass at 34th ave. for years, but no politician wanted to spend the money on their watch, it's now being built for millions more than it would have cost 10 years ago. No vision.
Thankfully, a group has been working to get enough signatures to force another plebiscite about the airport. This time the politicians better listen to us. They think nothing of spending our money on the Indy race, but they want to shut down a profitable airport. Typical.
Even with Iggy and the Liberals tanking, the Conservatives are not getting any traction with the electorate. Why?
In my opinion, the Conservatives have forgotten to be Conservative. I understand that they had to move to the center to gain more votes, but in doing so, they have become mushy. We know the Liberals have no principals and cater to special interest groups, while the NDP cater to the far left, and the Bloc cater to only Quebec socialists, but what about the Conservatives? Sure they are attractive to the right because they are the only party that we can vote for, but unless they come out with a strong Conservative plan next election, I don't see them getting a majority.
They are so scared of losing power that they are pleasing no-one. My own MP is so scared of doing anything wrong, hoping to get a Minister's position that my blog is a threat! HA! Now that they have the power, they are forgetting what got them there. Conservatives.
I want to see some action on crime, the gun registry, and the wheat board, for starters. Most important, I want to see the human rights commissions put out to pasture. I want this for Alberta as well as the federal HRC. The Conservatives have no balls on this matter, they were really happy when Liberal MP Keith Martin brought forward a bill against the HRC, so they wouldn't have to, how cowardly.
Refugees are another issue they need to address. If 70% of the people claiming refugee status return "home", they should not be allowed back into Canada. Period. Full Stop!
I feel that the Conservative party is relying too much on PM Harper's performance and has forgotten that it is us "peons" who make the party what it is, and we need more Conservative initiatives or we might just stay home on election night.
The last election campaign was pathetic, it left me wondering why I should vote Conservative, it had no substance, no goals, no definable direction. Wonder why the Conservatives seem to have no traction? They are becoming liberal lite. They need a good smack so they wake up and understand what Conservative really means.
Usually Catholics vote Liberal, I'm not sure why, but they do. Has that trend changed? I think it has. Door knocking last election, it was clear that the Chinese vote was shifting to the Conservatives, now I think the Catholic vote is also going towards Harper.
Take my Liberal parents for example. They think Trudeau walked on water. So, imagine my surprise when they wanted a plaque from PM Harper to commemorate their 60th wedding anniversary. My Mom didn't want one from the Pope, she doesn't like him (I agree), she didn't want one from Gordon Campbell, but she agreed to one from PM Harper.
My Dad actually said that Dion was better than Iggy. He was a Grand Knight in the Knights of Columbus, so he takes religion seriously. What finally got through to my parents was Iggy calling for abortions to third world nations. They were totally disgusted with his stance. Obviously the attempt by the Liberals to paint PM Harper as anti-abortion has failed badly with Catholics.
I have never seen my parents change so quickly. I usually get a good fight out of my Dad on anything Conservative, but this time I couldn't get him to argue with me. It made for family harmony, but it was boring not being able to disagree on politics with my Dad.
Now, my Uncle was a different story, he wants the 19B over 20 years for air support to go towards child poverty instead. When I turned to him and told him we would always have child poverty because it has become a profitable industry, he was speechless. He supports the NDP, and as such is a pie in the sky idealist.
Overall, BC is looking good for the Conservatives. I can tell you, when my parents think PM Harper is doing a good job, a long time barrier has been broken. They really do not like Iggy and will either vote Conservative, or refuse to vote at all. Polls can not accurately measure the true feeling on the ground.
My parents were also mad about the opposition keeping "tough on crime" legislation from being passed. They want more to be done not less, like not letting the Tamil boat into Canadian territory. The idea of a majority is now a reality, especially in the west.
Had a wonderful holiday, but now I'm back to bug you, and what better way than Friday night funnies. Enjoy! --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- A woman was having a daytime affair while her husband was at work. One rainy day she was in bed with her boyfriend when, to her horror, she heard her husband's car pull into the driveway.
'Oh my God - Hurry! Grab your clothes and jump out the window. My husband's home early!'
'I can't jump out the window. It's raining out there!'
'If my husband catches us in here, he'll kill us both!' she replied. 'He's got a hot temper and a gun, so the rain is the least of your problems!'
So the boyfriend scoots out of bed, grabs his clothes and jumps out the window! As he ran down the street in the pouring rain, he quickly discovered he had run right into the middle of the town's annual marathon, so he started running along beside the others, about 300 of them.
Being naked, with his clothes tucked under his arm, he tried to blend in as best he could. After a little while a small group of runners who had been watching him with some curiosity, jogged closer.
Do you always run in the nude?' one asked.
'Oh yes!' he replied, gasping in air. 'It feels so wonderfully free!'
Another runner moved a long side. 'Do you always run carrying your clothes with you under your arm?'
'Oh, yes' our friend answered breathlessly. 'That way I can get dressed right at the end of the run and get in my car to go home!'
Then a third runner cast his eyes a little lower and asked, 'Do you always wear a condom when you run?'
'Nope..just when it's raining.' --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- SEX AT 73!
I just took a leaflet out of my mailbox, Informing me that I can have sex at 73!
I'm sooooo happy, because I live at unit 67... So it's not far to walk home afterwards! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The liberals are asking us to give Obama time. We agree . . . And think 25 to life would be appropriate. --Jay Leno
America needs Obama-care like Nancy Pelosi needs a Halloween mask. --Jay Leno
Q: Have you heard about McDonald's' new Obama Value Meal? A: Order anything you like and the guy behind you has to pay for it. --Conan O'Brien
Q: What was the most positive result of the "Cash for Clunkers" program? A: It took 95% of the Obama bumper stickers off the road. --David Letterman -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Pole Dancing, the next Olympic sport!
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Is that Hillary? What is she hanging on to?
Answer: His stimulus package. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Sick Leave
I urgently needed a few days off work, but, I knew the Boss would not allow me to take leave.
I thought that maybe if I acted 'Crazy' then he would tell me to take a few days off.
So I hung upside-down on the ceiling and made funny noises.
My co-worker (who's blonde) asked me what I was doing.
I told her that I was pretending to be a light bulb so that the Boss might think I was 'Crazy' and give me a few days off.
A few minutes later the Boss came into the office and asked, 'What in the name of good GOD are you doing?'
I told him I was a light bulb.
He said, 'You are clearly stressed out.' Go home and recuperate for a couple of days.'
I jumped down and walked out of the office...
When my co-worker (the blonde) followed me, the Boss asked her, '..And where do you think you're going?!'
(You're gonna love this....)
She said, 'I'm going home, too. I can't work in the dark.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Have a great weekend....I saw a leaf fall today, I'm not ready for autumn yet!
