Friday Funnies: Harley Versus God!

Silver on the Hair

Gold on the Teeth.

Stones in the Kidneys

Sugar in the Blood.

Lead on the Feet.

Iron in the Arteries.

And an inexhaustible supply of Natural Gas.

We never thought to have accumulated such a wealth!
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A guy is driving around the back woods of Tennessee and he sees a sign in front of a broken down shanty-style house: 'Talking Dog For Sale'. He rings the bell and the owner appears and tells him the dog is in the backyard.

The guy goes into the backyard and sees a nice looking Labrador retriever sitting there.

'You talk?' he asks.

'Yep,' the Lab replies.

After the guy recovers from the shock of hearing a dog talk, he says 'So, what's your story?'

The Lab looks up and says, 'Well, I discovered that I could talk when I was pretty young. I wanted to help the government, so I told the CIA. In no time at all they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders, because no one figured a dog would be eavesdropping.'

'I was one of their most valuable spies for eight years running. But the jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn't getting any younger so I decided to settle down. I signed up for a job at the airport to do some undercover security, wandering near suspicious characters and listening in. I uncovered some incredible dealings and was awarded a batch of medals.'

'I got married, had a mess of puppies, and now I'm just retired.'

The guy is amazed. He goes back in and asks the owner what he wants for the dog.

'Ten dollars,' the guy says.

'Ten dollars? This dog is amazing! Why on earth are you selling him so cheap?'

'Because he's a liar. He never did any of that shit.
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Benny Hill, Wishing Well!

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Noah Today! Unfortunately all too realistic!
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The Harley-Davidson Facts

The inventor of the Harley-Davidson motorcycle, Arthur Davidson, died and went to heaven.

At the gates, St. Peter told Arthur.'Since you've been such a good man
and your motorcycles have changed the world, your reward is, you can hang out with anyone you want to in heaven.'

Arthur thought about it for a minute and then said "I want to hang out with God".
St Peter took Arthur to the Throne Room and introduced him to God.
God recognized Arthur and said, "Oh, so you were the one who invented
the Harley-Davidson Motorcycle?

Arthur said,'Yeah, that's me...'

God commented: 'Well, what's the big deal in inventing something that's pretty unstable, makes noise and pollution and can't run without a road?'

Arthur was a bit embarrassed, but finally spoke,
'Excuse me, but aren't you the inventor of woman?'

God said, 'Ah,yes.'

'Well,' said Arthur, 'professional to professional, you have some major flaws in your invention:

1. There's too much inconsistency in the front-end suspension!
2. It chatters constantly at high speeds!
3. Most rear ends are too soft and wobble about too much!
4. The intake is placed way too close to the exhaust
5. The maintenance costs are outrageous!!!!

'Hmmmmm, you may have some good points there,' replied God, 'hold on.'

God went to his Celestial supercomputer, typed in a few words and waited for the results. The computer printed out a slip of paper and God read it.

'Well, it may be true that My invention is flawed,' God said to Arthur, 'but according to these numbers, a lot more men are riding My invention then yours.
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Odd Couple, so inspiring!

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Back by popular demand....Find The Canadian!!!

A favorite game in Florida
It's time to play "Find the Canadian!"
This week's challenge is especially difficult. View the attached candid photograph and use logic to locate the clues that will let you 'Find the Canadian!'
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Do you have the skill?
Do you have the ability?
Do you know enough about your Northern Cousins?
Can You FIND THE CANADIAN?
Taking notes is permissible but try to limit your time to no more than 5 minutes!
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Good luck!

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The stupid mindless game: I'm not sure how this works, so it is freaky! She guessed my gift right off the bat, twice!

Regifting Robin!

Have a great day tomorrow! Global warming is just around the corner....it's called SPRING!!