Saturday, April 16, 2011

Friday Night Funnies: Politicians

While suturing a cut on the hand of a 75 year old rancher, who's hand was caught in the gate while working cattle, the doctor struck up a conversation with the old man. Eventually, the topic got around to Michael Ignatieff and his bid to be the PM of Canada.

The old rancher said, 'Well, ya know, he's a 'Post Turtle''. Not being familiar with the term, the doctor asked him what a 'post turtle' was.
The old rancher said, 'When you're driving down a country road and you come across a fence post with a turtle balanced on top, that's a 'post turtle'.

The old rancher saw the puzzled look on the doctor's face so he continued to explain.
. . . 'You know he didn't get up there by himself, he doesn't belong up there, and he doesn't know what to do while he's up there, and you just wonder what kind of dumb ass put him up there to begin with'.
"Walking Eagle"

Michael Ignatieff was invited to address a major gathering of the Indian Nation in B.C. this summer...
He spoke for almost an hour on his future plans for increasing every First Nation's present standard of living if he were elected Prime Minister. He assured them he was always urging the present government to address more of the native community's concerns.
At the conclusion of his speech, the Tribe presented the Ignatieff with a plaque inscribed with his new
Indian name - "Walking Eagle". The proud Ignatieff then departed in his motorcade, waving to the crowds.

A news reporter later inquired to the group of chiefs of how they came to select the new name given to Ignatieff.
They explained that Walking Eagle is the name given to a bird so full of shit it can no longer fly.

While creating husbands, God promised women that good and ideal husbands would be found in all corners of the world.

And then he made the earth round.

That God - He's such a joker!

My wife and I were in slow-moving traffic the other day and we were stopped behind a car that had an unusual Obama bumper sticker on it. It read: "Pray for Obama. Psalm 109:8".

When we got home my wife got out the Bible and opened it up to the scripture. She started laughing & laughing. Then she read it to me. I couldn't believe what it said. I had a good laugh, too.

Psalm 109:8 ~ "Let his days be few and brief; and let others step forward to replace him."

Bible, King James Version -- Psalm 109:8 Let his days be few; and let another take his office .

At last - I can honestly voice a Biblical prayer for our president!

Look it up - it is word for word!

Let us all bow our heads and pray.

Brothers and Sisters, can I get an AMEN??
Proof that Men Have Better Friends..

Friendship among Women:
A woman didn't come home one night. The next morning she told her husband that she had slept over at a friend's house. The man called his wife's 10 best friends. None of them knew anything about it.

Friendship among Men:
A man didn't come home one night. The next morning he told his wife that he had slept over at a friend's house. The woman called her husband's 10 best friends. Eight confirmed that he had slept over, and two said he was still there.
Your stupid, time wasting game, really does see if you are stupid...warning, you only have 8 seconds to answer each question. Smart or Stoopid?


West Coast Teddi said...

thanks Hunter ... 2 weeks of funny politics to go and FNF makes it all good!!

co-A...lition m-A-kes for A CPC m-A...jority!!!

MONSTER said...

He can`t handle a splitting maul proper how is he gonna handle the country.He probably don`t even know what he`s holding or how to use it.This is the fellow who has recollections of hunting ducks with a .22. O/T MITW went down again in the middle of shifting to the new server. Hope I can get this fixed soon. Got lots I want to post. Thanks for letting me whine Hunter.

L said...

Thanks for the reminder about Walking Eagle - sometime you have to really love the sense of fun of our first nations people!!!

Anonymous said...

Michael Ignatieff - Taking an axe to high prices!

I think he's demonstrating the Liberal's replacement to the F-35 fighter jet program!

MONSTER said...

One last word on the subject. Fibreglass handles suck.