New Years Funnies!

I know it's not Friday, but in the spirit (HA) of New Year's, I thought a few funnies would ring in the new year on the right note! I wish you all a Happy New Year! I want to thank you for all your comments and making blogging fun! I will keep blogging, if you keep commenting! Now to the funnies:

When an engineer owns a dog!


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A Little Canadian Humor,
Forget Rednecks,
Here is what Jeff Foxworthy has to say about Canucks.

If your local Dairy Queen is closed from
September through May,
You may live in Canada.

If someone in a Home Depot store
Offers you assistance and they don't work there,
You may live in Canada.

If you've worn shorts and a parka at the same time,
You may live in Canada.

If you've had a lengthy telephone conversation
With someone who dialed a wrong number,
You may live in Canada.

If 'Vacation' means going anywhere
South of Detroit for the weekend,
You may live in Canada.

If you measure distance in hours,
You may live in Canada.

If you know several people
Who have hit a deer more than once,
You may live in Canada.

If you have switched from 'heat' to 'A/C'
In the same day and back again,
You may live in Canada.

If you can drive 90 km/hr through 2 feet of snow
During a raging blizzard without flinching,
You may live in Canada.

If you install security lights on your house and garage,
But leave both unlocked,
You may live in Canada.

If you carry jumpers in your car
And your wife knows how to use them,
You may live in Canada.

If you design your kid's Halloween costume
To fit over a snowsuit,
You may live in Canada.

If the speed limit on the highway is 80 km --
You're going 90 and everybody is passing you,
You may live in Canada.

If driving is better in the winter
Because the potholes are filled with snow,
You may live in Canada.

If you know all 4 seasons:
Almost winter, winter, still winter,
And road construction,
You may live in Canada.

If you have more miles
On your snow blower than your car,
You may live in Canada.

If you find 2 degrees 'a little chilly',
You may live in Canada.

If you actually understand these jokes,
And forward them to all
Your Canadian friends & others,
You definitely live in Canada.
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One more bambi saved!
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I hope you look better than this guy tommorrow!! Stay away from the rum and Pepsi's!!

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After serious & cautious consideration . . .

Your contract of friendship has been renewed for the New Year 2009!
It was a very hard decision to make. So try not to screw it up!!!
My Wish for You in 2009

May peace break into your house and may thieves come to steal your debts. May the pockets of your jeans become a magnet of $100 bills. May love stick to your face like Vaseline and may laughter assault your lips! May your clothes smell of success like smoking tires and may happiness slap you across the face and may your tears be that of joy. May the problems you had forget your home address! In simple words . . . May 2009 be the best year of your life!!!